The other morning, on my way into work, I picked up a magazine.
I sat on the train, flipping through my magazine, when I came across an article, that, well, caught my attention.
A real life article, stating, “Listen, stop judging me...”
The article title – WHY is it wrong to BREASTFEED my 13-year-old?
Yeah. I'm pretty sure you're looking at the screen the EXACT same way I was looking at this magazine article. With a What. The. Fuck. Expression and a little bit of disbelief and maybe some disgust.
I've seen the debates online, the many topics of breastfeeding. Pro-BF, Anti-BF, Breast is Best, Nursing in public, etc etc. The breastfeeding debate online is vicious. I've seen such angry and rude comments about the subject, that it makes me cross.
I appreciate that for some women breastfeeding is not possible. Problems with milk production, latching on and the list goes on. I understand that some women do not like the idea of breastfeeding, preferring instead to formula feed. I've read the debates on line, read the comments and formed my own decision.
My decision is this.
My personal opinion is that when I have kids, my choice will be to breastfeed my children, if I can. If for whatever reason I am not able to do that, then I will formula feed. After all I can't leave my kid to starve.
If I am able to breastfeed, then I will do so until such time as my kid starts teething. Plastic nipple teats on bottles cope much better with teething babies, than actual nipples.
Not having any kids, I can't comment on the feeling of such experiences, however, as a woman, the idea of a baby that is teething and doesn't really understand what to do with said teeth latching on to my nipples.... NO WAY IN HELL.
That's my choice and I'm sticking to it.
So back to this article.
Rachel Waddell, From Yorkshire, is a 40 year old married mother of 3.
Rachel's son is 13, and weighs 10 stone, and still breast-feeds.
Rachel explains that neither her nor her sister were breastfed as babies, and when she fell pregnant for the first time she wanted to give her child the best possible start to life. She read up on breastfeeding, met with a breastfeeding group, read up on the benefits, the fact that some women aren't able to physically breastfeed, etc. She was determined to “give it a go”.
Once her son was born, breastfeeding was natural and the young baby thrived. Whilst other children his age caught colds and illness, Rachel's little one went from strength to strength. When he was 5, Rachel gave birth to another son, but still continue to breastfeed her now 5 year old 4 times per day, sometimes having to feed both children at the same time.
In public places, other mothers gave her looks of disgust and called her a freak and a weirdo, and although Rachel became used to such comments and looks, the hurt feelings were still there. Rachel's husband Dave (false name) encouraged her to laugh about it, and referred to her boobs as “milking machines”.
Several years later, the family had the heartache of losing family members to Cancer. Both of her in-laws passed away, losing their lives to cancer. Seeing family members suffer was heartbreaking and Rachel spent hours researching what the family could do to protect themselves from Cancer.
She read online an article on breastfeeding, it read “It's immune-stimulating effects may provide another significant advantage – protection against cancer.”
The article got her thinking. If she could give her kids the best chance at life, then why not her husband.
(it was at this point I did my second OMG expression)
Rachel discussed with her husband the article and he agreed to give breastfeeding a chance. To quote the article, I will do in full, so to give the full picture.
“At first he looked a bit hesitant, but eventually he agreed. I lifted up my nightdress and helped him latch on, just as I'd done with our sons. He began sucking and I giggled “Whoa there, gently!” As he fed from my breasts, I felt the same strong bond I'd experienced with our kids. Felt closer to him than ever, knowing I was looking after him.”
The article carries on with, “There was nothing sexy about it. I didn't see my breasts as sexual objects and neither did the kids or even Dave. He was far happier concentrating on other important parts of my body to keep pour love life sizzling!”
Time passed and Rachel gave birth to her third child, a girl, and by then her first son was almost a teenager and she tried to cut back his feeds to twice a day plus the occasional treat.
“It meant I was breastfeeding all three kids and my husband.”
On days when she was feeling under the weather, she'd even drink a small amount of her own milk, to perk herself up.
Rachel goes on in the article, advising that she constantly asks her children if they want to stop breastfeeding, but they say no, because they love being close to her.
She also advises that none of their friends know that they still breastfeed, because she has been sworn to secrecy.
Rachel often tells her children that their situation is not weird, it's just different, and the article ends with her explaining why she is telling her story in the magazine, to try and make readers understand where she is coming from. She says “Breastfeeding keeps my kids healthier, makes them more intelligent and, I hope, might even protect my husband from getting ill in the future. Until my children decide they don't want any more, this milk machine will keep producing their favourite treat.”
This article was told to Kara Dolman and Christina Windsor for
That's Life Magazine, Issue 14 - April 7
th 2011. That's Life Magazine pay up to £1000 for every story they print.
I've read this article three times now, and skimmed read it more times than I care to admit. I read it so often because I couldn't fully get my head around the notion of breastfeeding your kids into their teens and also breastfeeding your husband/partner.
I understand the benefits of breastfeeding your children, but when is enough enough? It's obviously down to each parental set, personally, as explained before, I'd stop as soon as my kid starting teething. I'd like my nipples to remain attached to the end of my boobs. That's wouldn't stop me from expressing milk and bottle feeding.
At what point do you stop your child from latching on to your breasts? 1 or 2, is the normal, from what I can see, and from experience with friends, nieces, nephews and god-children. But 13? Isn't that a bit too old to still be latching on to the breast?
The only other part of the article that bothers me, is where Rachel's says she's been sworn to secrecy, yet here she is giving a magazine article about breastfeeding her 13 year old child, and her husband. With pictures.
If you're sworn to secrecy, why do a magazine article, with photos? Surely there is every chance that someone you know, someone who knows your husband or your kids will read this article.
Was it for the money? To point out we don't actually know what sum was paid out, we can assume a sum was paid out, as That's Life magazine advises at the bottom of the article that they pay up to £1000 for every story that they print. Do I dare say it? Ah, what the heck, could this just be a publicity stunt?
After I'd read the article, I broached the subject in the office at work, read out a few parts of it, and showed everyone the pictures in the article. Pretty much every colleague of mine was in disbelief and slightly weirded out by it.
I then put it to Twitter, and @turbotas replied with “that's just too fricking weird. Three large lads? Poor woman must have nipples the size of dinnerplates :-)”
@justjuggling replied with “little britain-esque”
In fact, Jayne (@justjuggling) has a point. If you've ever watched Little Britain, there is a character called Harvey Pincher, a man who still breast-feeds from his mother, despite the fact that he's about 30, with his famous catchphrase “bitty!”. If you head over to YouTube and do a search for “Little Britain Bitty”, you'll get a fair few clips. It's cringe-worthy and hilarious (because that's the intention).
But this is real life (apparently).
This isn't the first article I've read of such things. A few months ago, in a similar styled magazine, I read a story of a woman who decided to breast feed her father to help him when he was diagnosed with Cancer. It seems that after several months of feeding him, his tumours shrank and this lady and her father firmly believe that breast milk is a good additional therapy to your regular chemo and radiation.
I suspect that this won't be the last article I'll see on such a topic, but I'm still interested to see what others think.
What do you think Internet?
I want to know what you think of this story, of this situation.
What was your reaction when you started reading this post.
Go one interwebs. Hit me with it. You know you wanna.
