"knocked out by my nunga nungas"

It really frustrates me to no end, when I get up one day to realise that none of my bras fit me anymore.  well. barring one, that fits, but only just.  Not only does it mean that I have to spend huge amounts of time finding the right bra that not only covers my nunga-nungas, but also restrains them so I don't put anyones eyes out, it also means that I have to spend copious amounts of money (in this job, money is pretty much non-existent!), AND that my boobs are still increasing in size.  I'm 25! soon to be 26!  Surely they should have stopped growing by now? right?

sigh.

I have no qualms about who knows what size my boobs are, cause lets face it, it's clear to the world that they're pretty humongous. and no. no I'm not exaggerating.  In 2007 the average bra size for a woman in the UK was 36C.  I was a 32C when I was 15.  I've always had big boobs, much to my horror, my friends jealousy and the boys delight.  10 years later I am a 36H. well.... I was.  It seems I've grown. again.  So now I have to go and be tested measured again.

All throughout my teenage years all I got from the boys was "oi! big boobs!" "show us ya boobs" "allright Dolly Parton?" "how big are your boobs?" "can I seem em?" "are they real?" -  you say it, i'm sure i've heard it at some point.  All I got from the girls was "you are so lucky, your boobs are massive" "wish my boobs were as big as yours" and then all I got from family "someone got the boob gene" "you should give me some of your boobs".  You can have 'em as far as I'm concerned.  Do you know how much they cost?!? to maintain, I might add, not to buy from a surgeon.

Did you know that boobs come with Health issues?  and I don't just mean breast cancer, but lots of other things too.  Such as Pytosis (sagging boobs), fibrocystic disease and breast pain (breast pain is called Mastalgia), Shoulder Pain, and Back Pain.  Not only does a woman have to worry about sagging boobs, but also the impact of bra's that are too tight fitting (these can constrict your lympahtic system and press on your nerves).  It's really unbelievable how many women are wearing the wrong sized bra.  Ladies, go get yourself tested - uh, measured.

Which brings me on to the subject of bra buying.  If you thought shopping was stressful (and some of you don't) bra shopping is horrible.  It's all well and fine if you are a 32B, 32C, 32D, 32DD, but the moment your boobs have grown to the size of small cantelope melons, then it becomes a problem. AND. just like clothes aren't all the same size (you'd think so right?!?) neither are bra's.  for instance a bra by marks and spencers Autograph range in a 34G, isn't the same size as a bra by Triumph's 34G bra.  hence, the stress.

So you're out shopping, and you see this pretty lacy pink bra, and you think, "that's nice" and you search through the rack, and oh. wait. only goes up to a 32D.  Nevermind, carry on. Then you see a really cute black balconette bra, with gold embroidary, and you think "ooh, that's pretty sexy" and you search through the rack, and oh. wait. only goes up to a 32D. (can you see where I'm going with this?)  After half an hour of looking at bra's, my blood pressure it up, and I'm grinding my teeth.  If it wasn't for the fact I have big boobs, I'd go braless. oh, and for the fact I may injure myself doing that.

Buying bra's for bigger boobs always ends up with me looking at really ugly hideous ones, or maternity and nursing bras.  Ocassionally when I do find a really cute bra, in my size, it's out of stock.  Sometimes I just got to suck it up and pay £32 for a plain bra. a decent plain bra at that.  Which I don't mind, but it's not like you can just buy 1.  You need at least 4 plain ones, and that's £128.  Then you got to have the "nice" ones for when you want to, y'know, get it on with your husband/boyfriend/guy next door etc.  Then you got to have a little slutty number for dirty weekends away.  It all adds up.
Not to mention, that when you become pregnant, your boobs get even bigger, and then you have to buy all new bras.

Sometimes I wish I had apples instead of melons.

God forbid I have kids, cause at the rate I'm going I probably won't be able to breastfeed without worrying if I'll crush my babies head. (That's not possible right?!?)

Guess I'd better make an appointment for a fitting and spend the last of the funds in my account on new bras before I get knocked out by my nunga nungas.